I’ve got a pretty profound relationship observation that seems popular with my girlfriends so I thought I would impart my wisdom.
I think relationships have three levels: Lover, Friend and Brother.
In the beginning of a relationship, you spend most of your time in Lover. What a great place! You can’t eat, all you do is daydream about your man, your stomach drops when you are around him. You know the place.
If you’re like me, your waaaaayy past the beginning so I spend most of my time in Friend. Steve, my husband, is basically my best friend. Not a bad place. More realistic to function on a daily basis. Once or twice a week, (usually during the commercials of the Daily Show) he’ll climb his way up to Lover.
Now, no one really wants their guy to drop down to Brother although this does happen on occasion. Maybe a loud bout of gas, a smelly burp, entering his newly vacated bathroom too soon or just after an epic battle.
The problem with dropping down to brother is that he’ll have to pass through Friend again before he can get to Lover. No skipping levels!!!
A couple examples:
Big fart in bed = BROTHER. He should not expect to climb to Lover for the rest of the night. Sorry dude. Sleep tight.
Fight in the evening = BROTHER. He’s still got time to get back to neutral into the Friend zone if he plays his cards right. If all goes incredibly well for him, he might even make it to Lover (think back massage). Good luck buddy!
The same levels are true for us, ladies! You can drop to Sister if you’re not careful.
Where do you spend most of your time? My goal is to hang in Friend, aim for Lover and deal with the occasional Brother.
Hope this helps!